Family mediation: what to expect

How mediation works, what it costs, when the mediation voucher scheme helps, and when mediation is not appropriate.

Updated 19 August 2026·6 min read
Written by CalmSplit Editorial TeamReviewed by Ramani GillLast reviewed 19 August 2026England & Wales

Mediation is a structured negotiation with a neutral professional. The mediator does not decide anything or give either of you legal advice.

The process

  1. A MIAM assessment meeting for each of you.
  2. Joint sessions, typically one to four, on finances or children.
  3. Disclosure exchanged and options tested.
  4. A memorandum of understanding, which is not binding until turned into an order.

When it does not fit

  • Domestic abuse or coercive control.
  • One party refusing to disclose finances.
  • Urgent risk to a child or to assets.

This article is general information about the law of England and Wales, not legal advice. For advice on your situation, speak to a solicitor.

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Frequently asked questions

Is mediation compulsory? ▼

The MIAM is normally required before applying to court, with exemptions. Mediation itself is voluntary.

Can we mediate remotely? ▼

Yes, most mediators offer video sessions and shuttle mediation.

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